May 18, 2003

Meat Science

These brave souls have finally put science, or at least math and a scale, to work answering the important question:

"How much is inside bacon bits?"

"12 slices is 63% of the pound of bacon, and since the package of bacon bits was only $1.89, you'd have to find raw bacon selling for $2.99 a pound to justify frying and Cuisinarting your own bacon bits"

I love them now.

Amazingly, Oscar Meyer apparently also has a theme park and a mulitcultural center (which as far as I can tell means "look! we photographed black kids, too!") in addition to bacon-on-the-go travel packs.

Nothing in this charming 'Wienerwhistle' description ("Wet your WIENERWHISTLE") makes it sound any less innocent than the name.

"...The WIENERWHISTLE is a "full-blown" musical instrument that plays a special tune in four notes. As one of our original ads explains, the WIENERWHISTLE has four holes:

• A hole to blow into
• A hole on the side
• A hole on the far end
• A hole on the top

"That's about twice as many as most whistles! And by covering the holes in a special way, you can play a bunch of different sounds."

I'll bet you can.

posted by CheekyMonkey at 08:36 AM

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